“God said: How to say this: There is nothing that I cannot do. There is not one miracle that I cannot create. I create life. I create beauty. I create land and sea. I create and recreate love. And, yet, I, God, do not fulfill everything you ask, no matter how deeply you desire it. I do not customarily raise the dead. I do not grant all your wishes. I may not grant half of them. Nor, when you believe you need Me the most, am I always there or, sometimes, it may feel to some, that I am never there.
How can that be? How can I let you down in your moment of need? How can I let you, My favored child, down at all? This makes no sense at all.” HL 4403
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“You believe that doing the opposite of God’s Will can be better for you. You also believe that it is possible to do the opposite of God’s Will. Therefore you believe that an impossible choice is open to you, and one which is both fearful and desirable. Yet God wills. He does not wish. Your will is as powerful as His because it is His.” ACIM 7-10
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It is inevitable that on the path to awareness of our real identity there are moments where we feel helpless. Broken heart, broken mind, broken body. The sense of helplessness sometimes seems even more dramatic because we know more and yet, we feel we have less power.
But is God letting us down or are we letting us down? Do we understand that we don’t understand and that we have to accept it?
Heartaches or mind aches?
What is the real difference between the heart and the mind? If we start from God’s perspective, God’s heart and God’s mind are two aspects of the same is. God is and nothing else is. God has no parts. Therefore mind and heart are a pure relation in oneness, a trinity of Being, Love, and Absolute Truth. We could say that God’s heart is love and God’s mind is truth or knowledge of Himself. We cannot separate love and truth no more than we can, on earth, separate time and space. They define each other reciprocally. But on earth everything being based on the principle of separation, time could be expressed as a separation from love and space as a separation from truth or vice versa. Then the relation between love and truth is expressed through the idea of absence, loss of memory, lack, guilt, and fear in a dualistic mode of thinking.
Yet, we know that in reality, it is impossible to separate from love or truth because we are the fruit of love and truth. But separation is virtually possible in thought, and thought is powered by the will. Our will is as powerful as God’s will because our will is His will. And this is what we chose to forget in order to experience our own independent, personal will.
If love and truth are one in heaven, what happened when we had the will to separate from our Creator and experience self-creation on earth? Love and truth were virtually separated because a real separation is impossible. By virtually separating the heart and the mind, the heart had to forget that it came from love and the mind had to forget what was its real identity, its real knowledge of itself. Yet the heart cannot really forget love no more than we can forget to breathe. It is automatic, subconscious. But the mind can forget love by forgetting its real identity. When the mind forgot its real identity, the virtual part of it that forgot became the intellect, the analytic or rational mind, the questioning mind.
A heart can never be really broken because love is existence, love is life. It is immortal, unchangeable, unalterable. We never really have a heartache otherwise we would not even exist. It is a perception. What we really have is a mind ache. Our mind, as God created it, is also immortal, unchangeable, unalterable because God created our mind in His image. That is why we can co-create with God. But only a mind can delude itself or deceive itself. It has the power to extend God’s creation or to project itself into illusion. A heart can never delude or deceive itself because it is of God’s essence without any possibility of opposites. But the mind can split and project opposites and fabricate illusions.
When we say we have a heartache or a broken heart, we mean in reality that we have a mind ache or a broken mind because we tend to identify ourself with our personal self instead of identifying with the identity God gave us. We, therefore, tend to identify with the outside divided reality and try to feel one with it instead of feeling one with our real source. That is why the body is also the ego’s best friend. The body allows the ego to feel real, separate, secrete. The body is the ego’s hiding place. It is also where ego experiences temporary suffering as well as temporary pleasure and, ultimately, temporary death as a reverse image of the eternity of the real Self.
Why God seems to leave us helpless
In the first place, when we are asking God for help, what kind of help are we calling for? Are we calling for the impossible or for guidance?
What is meant by calling for the impossible is when we ask God to help us by confirming what we want to hear. God has nothing to do with the world we decided to fabricate without Him. It is equivalent to asking God to help us by avoiding His guidance. In reality, it is asking to be weak. And we all know that weakness is made of fear. Are we afraid that a sacrifice will be asked from us?
The only sacrifice that God could ask us if we want to accept His help is to sacrifice our illusions. Another aspect of the perceived sacrifice is our personal will to control and make decisions. And this will is very powerful. Our will is as powerful as God’s because our fundamental, true will is God’s will. Our will to desire and act separately is very powerful yet it cannot create but only project illusions which are meaningless. In order to co-create we can only will with God which means that we have to suspend our will to decide because there is no more need for a decision.
We come to create such a confusion in ourself when we ask for God’s help and, at the same time, we are fearing His answer, thinking that we will have to sacrifice something. The perceived helplessness does not come from God’s coldheartedness but from our inability to follow His guidance without fear of losing something that is still more valuable than what we are asking help for from God. This is our projection which attests that we have confused motivations. And with confused and conflicting motivations (ego’s preferred trick on us), our trust in God becomes impossible. But who is not to be trusted? God or the one who is calling for help?
An answer without question
When we are asking for help, are we at the same time asking for a command from God? But God never commands because commanding is assuming inequality while we were created equal in God’s image. God demonstrates constantly that inequality does not exist. He does not really make the difference between I, you, me, them and I AM. One is one and only one. How could one be unequal to one?
When we feel sick, helpless, we also want an explanation from God, we want to know what we did wrong to be in a painful situation. We want God to tell us that we were wrong somewhere. But what can be gained if God says we were wrong? In our sense of not being heard from God, there is a confrontation between the self we made with the Truth God created us with.
What would happen if God confronted the truth of who we are with the personal self we made? We would be scared to death, we would be terrified.
Conversely, if God showed us our perfection before we were willing to see it, He would make us believe that we are wrong. But He created us perfect in His image. So we can’t be wrong. God cannot teach us that we are not perfect because He would lose His own certainty. He can only show us that our illusions have no reality so there is no guilt, no sin to worry about. Otherwise, we would think of ourself that we are lacking and unable to bring ourself to the awareness of our perfection, which is the only true healing of everything.
How can we understand our sense of helplessness? It was a choice, a detour in experiencing what it is to forget love, to live fear and darkness then seek to remember love and light again. What was an answer without question in heaven became a question without an answer on earth. The answer can still be found in the silence.
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Reading your blog gets me 10 notches higher in comprehension.
I feel like your blog is like a pool of water spreading and lapping in all the crevices, filling in the crevices of my understanding.
More, more!
I think Heavenletters and A Course in Miracles are inexhaustible sources of inspiration. You let them take you were they want without really having to make any decision. Isn’t amazing that in Heavenletters, it is God Who is speaking and in A Course in Miracles, it is the Son Who is speaking. And the Father and the Son are One.
The writing is deciding itself where it will take me. I start with an idea and I never know where it will lead me. And it always take me on a new level of myself. Thanks so much Gloria for delivering us daily such a fountain of light from the Father.